June 28, 2008

JB Meet

WooHooo,

It was great to meet more jber's in Tas :)

Although I was on a bit of a high... which died very quickly when everyone left :( hehehe

DH got home about 6:30 alot later than expected but really why expect less than that when he was at his mothers.
So I am on a downer, wanting to start a creative streak I have so much I want to do right now I am not really sure where it is all coming from!
I will be borrowing my sister's sewing machine while she is living with my mum again, and my first project will be to make my little boy some trousers. Then a hat... after that, I am not sure. But when I do any of it I will post it here. I also need to make a pressie for someone. Oh I have to check the trading post too... another present.

Er that is all, it was really great to have a lovely bunch of people in my house and great to see the guys supporting their partners... mine was absent! Not that he isn't supportive but he has to do things his own way and meeting my group is not his way apparently.

anyway thanks for the lovely day

June 20, 2008

Launceston Ten, JB meet.

Well, I have just signed myself up to do the Launceston Ten. It is a 10km walk/run to raise money for the Tassie Devil facial tumour research. I am not sure how I will go with it being as unfit and overweight as I am, but I am pulling one for the Babywearers and taking my son on a 10km journey wrapped to my chest :) on the 20th of July.

I am having the Tassie Joyous Birth meet at my house in 8 days time and I am so excited to be doing it. I only wish my house was already clean *laughs*. I am thrilled to have some of the JBer's coming to my home and excited at the prospect of cooking some yummy food for us all :)
Having said that I am not in the least bit excited about the work I so obviously have to do around here to make my house even slightly appropriate for people to meet in it.

So a busy weekend ahead of me with cleaning, decluttering and recycling of more too small clothes of Ishtar's. Not to mention the fact that tomorrow is the winter solstice and I plan on doing something great for that too!

June 13, 2008

HomeBirth Tasmania

I have started up this group as a means to help people understand that there is support available for those who do not want to birth in the westernised standard. (If I can call it that)

In doing so I have come to understand that there is alot of thoughts and feelings in my head about my own misgivings and lack of understandings that need to be worked on.

I can not comprehend how it feels to have a massive birth trauma, and this brings me to the knowledge that I can therefore never hope to fully support someone through that. I have only even been in contact with people who are happy at the outcome of their surgery and had elected to take the same option for birth the next time around.
I fear because of this I may never fully reach my capacity to help people through birth and birth trauma because I can not fully understand what they are going through and this saddens me greatly.

I am not the type of person who articulates things well and for that reason I fear as a homebirth advocate, and a future doula. I will lack the courage and capacity to support women in the way that they rely on me to do because I can not explain the reasons behind the choices these woman have made with my backing! I understand my reasoning and believe in it fully, but I can not seem to convey that reasoning to other people. I can not speak publicly, will that have an impact on how this group is run and what we stand for if the person who started the whole idea can not get up and speak on behalf of the entire group?

I have no idea where to start working through these things or even if it is possible to work through them, I just need to put it all out there.

I need to apologise. I am sorry I can't support you in the way that you need at the moment, I have tried to see past everything else, but I still come up short of where I need to be for you. The experience you had is so far beyond my comprehension that I do not know the first step to take to help you work through it and for that reason I find taking a step back more appropriate for me at this time.

June 8, 2008

6 years ago

I gave birth to my daughter!!! I can't believe it was 6 years ago already, I spent all day making things for her birthday party, which was a great success. I am exhausted much like I was this time 6 years ago. I have so much stuff in my head to get out but nothing is coming forth at the moment so maybe soon.

June 2, 2008

Reasons

I am here, in my first attempt of possibly many random spillings of blogness, because I have come to realise, recently, just how much I (and my life) have changed over the years. I read a book of poetry that I wrote as a teenager yesterday, and realised how ignorant I have been to my own wishes for what life would bring that person. The ideas I had for my life where so different back then than they are today, and so begins a new journey and chapter in said life!